Today, as part of our Truth series, we have the huge privilege of having Wesley Gunter, the PR Director and Owner of Right Hook Communications.
Enjoy the feature!
WW: Hello Wesley! Can you tell us more about yourself and what you are doing?
Wesley Gunter: Hi there! My name is Wesley Gunter and I am the PR Director and Owner of Right Hook Communications, a boutique PR agency that likes to push boundaries and buttons as we always strive to get our clients seen and heard by using unconventional methods. You may visit our website here!
WW: How would you define “the truth”? Is there a truth, or is everything subjective? How do you tell?
Wesley Gunter: I think the truth to me is defined from the perspective of the person based on their background and personal life experiences. It’s also a matter of choice for the person if they want to see the truth for what it is or be in denial based on their belief system.
This comes back to the notion of a glass being half full or half empty – two different perspectives but still somewhat the truth.
For example, if a person is brought up in a certain way like being overly religious or conservative, the truth to them can be very different from someone with a more liberal upbringing.
So to answer the question if there is a truth, I think the definition of ‘truth’ should be a more personal one as compared to a generic term. There is no right or wrong answer to what the truth is.
WW: What are the three ways you can tell the truth to someone without being offensive?
Wesley Gunter: Well unfortunately when the truth is being told from the perspective of another individual it is bound to offend someone as it’s a shock to the system.
For example if a person has been looking at the world from ‘black & white’ lenses their whole life and someone tells them that there are more than just two colours, they are going to be in denial at first.
However, there are some things you can do which I have learnt to soften the blow:
- Listen first
It’s always good to listen to the other person’s view first to gauge their perspective before saying anything. This is to not only understand their logical thinking process but to also help you in putting your points across systematically to counter their arguments.
- Be systematic. Keep it simple
When you argue with someone in denial you need to use plain and simple logic to counteract their arguments. Most of the time people in denial like to use bombastic words and technical jargon to make themselves sound important. Cut through all that bullshit with plain and simple English and they will look like a fool at the end of the day.
- Stay Calm
When arguing with a person in denial the best thing you can do is not get angry. Think about it. Wouldn’t you be upset if your whole world came crashing down because all that you have lived for is a lie?
I leave you with one of my favourite quotes– “Arguing with idiots is like playing chess with a pigeon..no matter how good you are, the bird is going to shit on the board and strut around like it won anyway.”
WW: What are the three ways a person can accept the truth without being offended?
Again I stress that to not be offended would not be possible given the situation. However here are some suggestions.
- Breathe. Don’t Panic
Yes these are things you don’t want to hear. You will be angry but don’t react otherwise you will look like a fool. Just listen and be open.
- Clarify facts
Take some time to check with your sources if this new revelation is in fact the truth. Once you have done your homework you are in a better position to make a more logical judgement.
- Reflect and tell yourself it’s not the end of the world
Even if your current belief is shattered now like a cheap Christmas ornament with this new revelation, you have to now learn how to live with the truth. You have a choice though in taking the blue pill or red pill. Live in denial or accept the truth and change your life.
WW: On a parting note, can you give us a painless tip to check if a person is not lying to himself/herself?
Slap yourself approximately 6 times very hard…No I’m kidding, that would be painful.
I think if a person is not afraid to offend others with their opinions it’s a sure sign that he or she is honest with themselves.
If you are so worried about what others think of you then you are obviously lying to yourself.
Learn to not give a fuck. Start by swearing openly. Its liberating😊